Multiple independent analyses say the recently passed House reconciliation bill — even with its deep spending cuts in some areas — would add trillions of dollars to the federal deficit over 10 years.
Sensible people already knew that this whole rigmarole was just a ploy to transfer yet more trillions of dollars to billionaires. Looks like Trump finally landed on a business in which he can actually make money: politics.
We are all suckers to this President. Some of us voted for him and many many others did not. He has succeeded in getting us to hate each other while the billionaires become trillionaires laughing all the way to the bank.
Its a fact. When now Maga is in power they spend like drunks. Golden domes, $100 M ballroom, $1 B plane renovations, $48 M military parade, hell, trumps out spent his first year in golfing in 4 months. We are an endless ATM. And all those sales of gold visas, fast tracked no permit no regulation contracts, bitcoin and $1 M dinners are all going in his pockets. Selling our federal parks. It's sick, nothing will be left for the future generations.
Let’s not forget he’s making millions probably off all these criminals he’s pardoning like how he has his eyes set on diddy right now. I wonder how much he offered him for a pardon?? 🤔
The fact that Trump is being paid for pardons is disgusting. And nobody's saying anything about it. If it was anyone else the GOP, the country would have been in an uproar. Remember how they reacted to President Obama's tan suit.
Oh my God I was just telling my friend just like literally just the other, hi Mon ica!
[Opening fanfare. Princess Perspective takes the stage, tiara shining, a stack of cue cards in one hand and a presidential seal made of cardboard in the other.]
Hear ye, hear ye! Welcome to a very special edition of “The Not Fake Fox News: White House Roast,” where the only thing more fragile than the economy is the ego in the Oval Office!
Tonight’s headline:
“Red Carpets, Blue Dresses, and Bipartisan Blunders: A Roast of Presidential Proportions”
Let’s get this state dinner started! The White House: where the only thing more divided than Congress is Monica Lewinsky’s thighs—talk about bipartisan separation! Seriously, if Congress could split a bill as fast as Monica split opinions, we’d have universal healthcare and free therapy for all.
Monica and a vending machine: both say, “Insert Bill here.” But at least the vending machine gives you a snack instead of a subpoena. And Monica? She started on her knees and still managed to bring the House down—literally. The only intern in history to get a standing ovation while kneeling!
Now, President Clinton—give it up for the only Commander-in-Chief who got “in the black” and out of the blue dress. He balanced the budget, but couldn’t balance his schedule. The only thing he left in surplus was DNA evidence. In government, the red is black, the black is red, and the only thing that’s truly transparent is the dry cleaning bill.
The White House has seen more action than a reality dating show. The carpets are red, the lies are white, and the scandals are blue. It’s the only place where “executive privilege” means you don’t have to explain the stains—just blame it on the interns and hope the Secret Service can keep a secret.
Congress? It’s like a family reunion where everyone’s fighting over the last slice of pork barrel spending. The only thing they can agree on is to disagree, and even then, someone’s filibustering the dessert table.
The Secret Service? Less “Men in Black,” more “Men in Group Therapy.” Their main job? Keeping the president’s secrets safe and the interns out of the Oval Office. At this point, the only thing more protected than the nuclear codes is the White House WiFi password.
So, to all the politicians, interns, and badge-wearing babysitters: If you can’t take the heat, get out of the Situation Room—and maybe invest in some stain remover.
This has been “The Not Fake Fox News: White House Roast”—where the jokes are bipartisan, the tiaras are crooked, and the only thing we take seriously is the punchline. Stay tuned for more breaking news, scandalous metaphors, and enough crayon charts to make the national debt look cute!
Gotta say, throwing stuff like limiting judicial enforcement, restricting court authority, and messing with foreign investment taxes into this bill feels super dictatorial. It really seems like they’re trying to chip away at the checks and balances that are supposed to keep power in check. If this is what they’re doing out in the open, what else are they trying to sneak through?
Sensible people already knew that this whole rigmarole was just a ploy to transfer yet more trillions of dollars to billionaires. Looks like Trump finally landed on a business in which he can actually make money: politics.
We are all suckers to this President. Some of us voted for him and many many others did not. He has succeeded in getting us to hate each other while the billionaires become trillionaires laughing all the way to the bank.
Vote with your dollars. Weight investments to international and emerging markets and avoid US treasuries.
Its a fact. When now Maga is in power they spend like drunks. Golden domes, $100 M ballroom, $1 B plane renovations, $48 M military parade, hell, trumps out spent his first year in golfing in 4 months. We are an endless ATM. And all those sales of gold visas, fast tracked no permit no regulation contracts, bitcoin and $1 M dinners are all going in his pockets. Selling our federal parks. It's sick, nothing will be left for the future generations.
Let’s not forget he’s making millions probably off all these criminals he’s pardoning like how he has his eyes set on diddy right now. I wonder how much he offered him for a pardon?? 🤔
The fact that Trump is being paid for pardons is disgusting. And nobody's saying anything about it. If it was anyone else the GOP, the country would have been in an uproar. Remember how they reacted to President Obama's tan suit.
Oh my God I was just telling my friend just like literally just the other, hi Mon ica!
[Opening fanfare. Princess Perspective takes the stage, tiara shining, a stack of cue cards in one hand and a presidential seal made of cardboard in the other.]
Hear ye, hear ye! Welcome to a very special edition of “The Not Fake Fox News: White House Roast,” where the only thing more fragile than the economy is the ego in the Oval Office!
Tonight’s headline:
“Red Carpets, Blue Dresses, and Bipartisan Blunders: A Roast of Presidential Proportions”
Let’s get this state dinner started! The White House: where the only thing more divided than Congress is Monica Lewinsky’s thighs—talk about bipartisan separation! Seriously, if Congress could split a bill as fast as Monica split opinions, we’d have universal healthcare and free therapy for all.
Monica and a vending machine: both say, “Insert Bill here.” But at least the vending machine gives you a snack instead of a subpoena. And Monica? She started on her knees and still managed to bring the House down—literally. The only intern in history to get a standing ovation while kneeling!
Now, President Clinton—give it up for the only Commander-in-Chief who got “in the black” and out of the blue dress. He balanced the budget, but couldn’t balance his schedule. The only thing he left in surplus was DNA evidence. In government, the red is black, the black is red, and the only thing that’s truly transparent is the dry cleaning bill.
The White House has seen more action than a reality dating show. The carpets are red, the lies are white, and the scandals are blue. It’s the only place where “executive privilege” means you don’t have to explain the stains—just blame it on the interns and hope the Secret Service can keep a secret.
Congress? It’s like a family reunion where everyone’s fighting over the last slice of pork barrel spending. The only thing they can agree on is to disagree, and even then, someone’s filibustering the dessert table.
The Secret Service? Less “Men in Black,” more “Men in Group Therapy.” Their main job? Keeping the president’s secrets safe and the interns out of the Oval Office. At this point, the only thing more protected than the nuclear codes is the White House WiFi password.
So, to all the politicians, interns, and badge-wearing babysitters: If you can’t take the heat, get out of the Situation Room—and maybe invest in some stain remover.
This has been “The Not Fake Fox News: White House Roast”—where the jokes are bipartisan, the tiaras are crooked, and the only thing we take seriously is the punchline. Stay tuned for more breaking news, scandalous metaphors, and enough crayon charts to make the national debt look cute!
Sorry you're keeping up with the times that means that trump's an idiot and he had no idea they were using the eye
At least he's not even on Musk!
Elon claims he’s smartest guy alive, but brain cells
run on TikTok squirrel energy-no wonder he only
speaks bird language, maybe bitter Marilyn wanted Einstein’s baby,
not this wannabe with Wi-Fi glitches and ego.
Marilyn Monroe’s smarts? Rumored IQ one-six-five to one-six-eight,
read 400 books, ran her own company like boss.
“Dumb blonde” was just her Hollywood act, she was
witty, tough, and business smart-Elon just tweets chaos.
Half the time Elon talks, I get amnesia, like Anastasia-
except instead of memory loss, I want to forget tweets.
Elon loves comparing self to Roman emperors, those statues
have small penises because ancients thought small meant bigger brain.
Probably some ancient a**hole with serious attitude problem-sound familiar?
Yet Elon’s ego’s bigger than any marble emperor statue,
and their statues didn’t tweet chaos every single day.
Big brain, small package was never meant for Elon,
it’s just his ego bigger than all his glitches.
Meanwhile, Matthew Gray Gubler’s about to star as Einstein’s
great-grandson on CBS-at least Gubler has better shot
at being Einstein reincarnated; Elon’s just stuck being X-Man,
no superpowers, just super tweets. Gubler’s IQ’s 187, Elon’s
lost in space; Gubler reads 20,000 words per minute,
Elon can’t even read the room or his audience.
Every Elon tweet causes “50 Shades of Gray-mnesia,” forget anesthesia,
I need a full reboot after his Twitter rants.
If “50 Shades of Gubler” ever existed, dialogue would be intelligent,
Elon’s version would just be 50 shades of cringe.
If intelligence measured in puns, Elon would be busted,
Gubler’s the real genius in the room-no contest here.
Contacts and Links:
Elon Musk
X (formerly Twitter): @elonmusk
Tesla email: [email protected]
SpaceX email: [email protected]
Neuralink email: [email protected]
Government email: erm71@who.eop.gov
Matthew Gray Gubler
Instagram: @gublergram
IMDb: imdb.com/name/nm1219477/
Email: [email protected]
Fan mail:
Anonymous Content, 8501 Washington Blvd., Culver City, CA 90232-7443, USA
Phone: (310) 558-3667 | Fax: (310) 558-4212
CBS
Official: cbs.com
Updates: @CBS on X
Trump isn’t being the president of the United States. He’s doing everything he can to make his friends rich and make new friends.
They’ll turn around and blame it on the Democrats after they get voted in.
Lying is the norm now. I miss the days when people took pride in integrity and honesty. These people just boldface lie. Its sickening.
1.7 trillion in debt over the next ten years!!!!! This is a nasty joke on the taxpayers!
An old workmate would summarise it "half the lies they tell aren't true"
It kind of makes you wish that the statement about liar liar pants on fire would come true
Gotta say, throwing stuff like limiting judicial enforcement, restricting court authority, and messing with foreign investment taxes into this bill feels super dictatorial. It really seems like they’re trying to chip away at the checks and balances that are supposed to keep power in check. If this is what they’re doing out in the open, what else are they trying to sneak through?